Twenty-six years ago, a young Indian woman by the name of Amruta lived in Goa, India, and was pregnant with a child. Due to her young age and other extreme factors, Amruta was blessed and given the rare opportunity to give birth to her child and give up her personal rights as a mother. After making this difficult and selfless decision, Amruta gave birth to her daughter on June 11th, who she personally named Nisha. Amruta is a loving woman and knew that she could not provide a safe and healthy life for herself and Nisha in India alone. As a result of her selfless act, Amruta gave Nisha up for adoption at a local orphanage in Caranzalem in hopes that Nisha would grow up with every opportunity possible.
About six months later, I, Nisha, was adopted into an American family from Idaho. Randall and Stephanie Grayson were a young married couple with a daughter named Randa of their own. After a couple of years of consistently following the strict guidelines, procedures, and financial payments of adoption, they received a baby picture of me with a note stating that they will be welcoming their new baby girl to their family soon.
My new family waited for me at the Los Angeles airport on December 30, 1983. My family cried and smiled when they held me for the first time. A few years later my parents got a divorce and my mother moved my sister and I up to Elk Grove. My first week in junior high school, is when I met my best friend Reena Ray in our gym class. I was so attracted and drawn to her. We became close friends almost immediately. Later in High school I became closer to her sister Sharmila. During our early college years, I became very close to Reena’s friends Victor and Hitesh
Since I did not grow up in a traditional Indian household, I was not exposed to the Indian culture, language, music, films, materials, spices, and all the other aspects of the extravagant Indian lifestyle. The first thing I want to do to experience these aspects is to travel to India and see the life I could have had so easily if Amruta did not make the decision of adoption. I want to feel like I blend in instead of standing out in the middle of the crowd alone. I want to see Indian woman who look similar to me. I want to see the Indian ocean, rivers, and lakes. I want to see how people live, speak, eat, travel, work, worship, the architecture and everything else possible.
It is challenging for me to understand and especially say that I am proud to be Indian, but not know the true meaning of being Indian. The wisdom that I develop on this journey will definitely shape how I live my life in the future. I am ready for change.
I think about Amruta almost every day. The thought of having the possibility of finding information about her or even getting a hold of a picture makes me want to break down. This journey to India is going to help me honor my family history and my Indian mother.
I want to thank my family for all the strength they have passed down to me to seek out this journey. I also want to thank my friends for helping me get to where I need to go. Thank you to all that have listened to me cry and yell about my confusion. I love all of you guys very much and you all will be with me for the rest of my life. Thank you so much for loving me for who I am.
